to you, with love

the past few weeks have been truly great, because i got to spend time with you. time which otherwise would have been spent either studying for some test, or planning for some event. no, i am not saying that you have taken me away from what i should be doing, but that you were a much needed respite from my schedule.

i needed that time, to lose myself in myself, to reconnect with what i may have lost. and i needed that time, to see that it is all fine the way things are, or whether i needed to do anything about anything. i am happy to see that things are going well, and very very relieved indeed.

i worry sometimes about neglecting and forgetting the things that matter. i fear losing these things that matter. but i sometimes find myself at a loss, being inadequately resourced in time, effort and empathy. sometimes i wish there were more of me, so that all that is expected of me, can be fulfilled.

but you, in kindness, accept me for all my flaws and unbecomings. in fact, you strive to see that i am not burdened and that i never feel inadequate. you allow me to lord you over, you simply refuse to disagree. like the willow that bends in the storm, but never falling over, you silently stand your ground in the face of my tempestuous nature. you should know, that in the end, the silent dripping of the rain on the mountain, wears it down. and that the water prevails.

that, is you.

as how rain earns the respect of the mountains, you have earned my love, my trust and my faith. and a privilege that none other has ever. a privilege only fit for one.
and while you are in complete knowledge of this privilege, you never abuse it, though many a time you could have, simply.

and that only increases the power of that privilege.

i am clear enough to the forces that move you and me. and i am eternally grateful to have been given you to love and cherish. i understand your desire to be and yet to refrain, i understand your needs and your fears, and i appreciate the mercy with which you handle your affairs with me, ensuring that i do not get hurt.

i have learnt many things, thanks to you.

my love, i do not wish to impose anything more upon you. and i wish to repay the kindness that you have shown. what is unsaid, is spoken very evidently to me, as you know. and i know.

let us not deny what moves us. but let us know, that i am always there. in my happiness, in my grief, in my anxiety, in my anger, in my apathy - i always will be there whether you ask it of me or not.

sing your own song, dearheart, and i will sing the harmony.
dance your own moves, dearheart, and i will be the beat.

and when you wish solitude, love, it will be given, no questions asked.

i believe in the sanctity and strength of what we have.
and i will never tire saying this.

i love you true.